Trying out the corset top trend and sharing some body image business.
This post contains affiliate links.
Okay, you guys. Buckle up. I promise we’ll get to this viral Amazon corset top in a minute, but first I wanted to share something super personal and something I know so many of us deal with– especially in the blogging space.
Picture this: you plan + execute a shoot (multiple outfits, accessories, hair, makeup), and everything vibes. The lighting is gorgeous, the weather is cooperating, the shots are effortless, you feel cute (so important), and you’re amped because you just checked off weeks and weeks of blog content.
Then you upload the photos to start editing, only to discover you hate it. Like, all of it. And it throws you into one helluva bad body image tailspin.
This just happened to me a few weeks ago.
Reviewing the photos, it was like I forgot how to pose. Now, you scrap a ton of photos in every shoot because you’re moving around, showcasing the outfit, keeping it fluid, etc., so there are “in-between” shots that get cut because you just look… well, weird. I’d say out of 150 pictures I typically take for an outfit post, I toss out 135 of them. That’s normal.
This was different.
All the angles were bad. I wasn’t hitting any poses, it was like I was always in between camera snaps. My body didn’t look flattering; it was stiff, off-kilter. I kept clicking through, thinking the photos would reveal a groove I got into… Nope. I felt bulky, boxy, gross. The good lighting I had been excited about wasn’t helping me. The outfits I had felt beautiful in fell flat as they popped up on my laptop screen– in one outfit the waist wasn’t cinched enough to flatter, my arms looked weird in another, I had a belt on bloody backward in one look (I still don’t know how I didn’t catch that), and my posture was horrible throughout the entire shoot. I had also forgotten how to pose with my face. I looked irritated in some shots, awkward in others. My smile was weird or forced (and sometimes both).
Now, I’ve been doing this for 10 years– I’ve had several blog shoots where the end-result shots weren’t that great. It’s disappointing, yes. But you tell yourself that these things happen, bodies can look weird at different angles, the outfit doesn’t photograph well, and you move on. (It’s so true— some outfits are dope in real life and just don’t translate on camera.)
For whatever reason, this particular blog shoot fail hit me differently. I couldn’t shrug it off; my body image took a 1929-style nosedive. I couldn’t even look at the photos again for over a week (one reason the blog’s been dark). Normally, I can power through. Find a few workable shots. Tell myself that everyone has off days and move on. But not this time.
I know we’ve all been there– everyone, not just bloggers. Everyone, not just women.
So why write this?
Because we rarely talk about it. Our blogs and social feeds aren’t full of the bloopers where you’re a slouchy mess or are making the most unflattering face. It’s human nature to want to show the good stuff and the good stuff only But I think talking about the things we normally delete– physically and metaphorically– helps normalize them.
The truth was: nothing is wrong with my body. (At any angle.) But today’s beauty standards have a pretty narrow view of “flattering” and “beautiful” and that’s where we’ve been conditioned to default. And then judge ourselves and marinate in shame when we don’t live up to them.
Those standards say nothing of my worth, which remains the same on both bad body image days and good.
Another really important note: I live in a body that carries a lot of privilege. Straight-sized, white, abled. I can hide the areas of my body that society doesn’t value (that’s so gross to type, I gotta tell you), but some cannot. My body image issues are valid, but I have to acknowledge that my experience is never going to be on the level of those with marginalized bodies. Fat bodies, bodies of color, disabled bodies. People whose body does not fit neatly with their gender identity. Perfectly normal and beautiful bodies, but bodies that are censored or ridiculed and thus end up being underrepresented.
So here is one of the outfits from the Shoot That Went Wrong. After I picked myself up a bit (more on how below), I revisited the photos and found this outfit– which, hello, turned out super cute + fun. This just goes to show how potent body image negativity can be– once I was feeling shit about the way I looked, I thought everything looked terrible. That perspective tainted everything.
This Amazon corset top was all over TikTok (for about $25, I see why) so I added one to cart to experiment with pieces in my wardrobe. The draping is quite good and the boning in the corset is legit. (It zips in the back, so no begging for help getting laced into this thing.) The pretty pink color seemed fun coupled with a pair of wide-leg, faded culotte jeans.
It felt 90s to me, so I added a pair of barely-there strappy black sandals. Simple, easy, but have more style payoff than you might imagine. A fuchsia lip (and matching pedicure– see what I mean about the blog shoot planning?!) and some white beaded statement earrings finished things off.
Not into showing this much skin? A-okay. Just throw a blazer or a boyfriend-style jean jacket over the top of the corset. An oversized button-up (worn off one shoulder if you want to get sassy) will also do the trick. And come fall, I’m totally layering a lightweight black turtleneck under this corset top and wearing it with high-waisted wool trousers.
Shop the look:
So how did I get over my body image shame spiral? Well, first: “get over” is a misleading term. Body image issues aren’t linear; you don’t “conquer” them and never experience them again. There will be bad days and good days. And it’s important to know that one bad day (or bad week, month, etc.) doesn’t undo all the good days. Mastering your body image isn’t actually a thing– it’s not a course you study and then pass via a test at the end. It fluctuates. You roll with the punches, so to speak.
For this particular episode, I leaned on my support system. My boyfriend and best friend were really supportive. I did a lot of journaling + meditating about how I was feeling. I free wrote all the bullshit spinning around in my head about the way I saw the shoot and how I looked, and then read it back to myself. Edited. Picked it apart. Flagged the lines that were obviously false. I thought about how I would react to reading it if it weren’t coming from me– if it were coming from my best friend or someone I cared about. It allowed me to soften how hard I was being on myself.
I also gave myself space. I took some time off the blog and turn my focus elsewhere. I gave myself the agency to take time away from something that was, at that moment, hurtful and triggering. When it didn’t feel so sharp, I came back and took a look with fresh eyes. Did I still a lot of outfits? Yes. They just didn’t work. And that’s okay. It was the shoot that didn’t work, not me that didn’t work.
I wanted to share this because I think it’s something all of us deal with in some way or another, whether we’re bloggers who put themselves on the internet for the world to see or just regular people who post the occasional selfie. We all have times when body image issues rear up and take us out for a bit. The more we talk about them, the more we see that they happen to everyone, period.
I hope this was a helpful read– at the very least, it was cathartic for me to get it out. 🙂
Linking up with Elegantly Dressed and Stylish, The Fashion Canvas, I Do DeClaire, Style Splash, Straight A Style, Jersey Girl Texan Heart, Living on Cloud Nine, Effortlessly Sophisticated, Curly Crafty Mom + Doused in Pink, Mummabstylish, Elegance & Mommyhood, Nancy’s Fashion Style, Confessions of a Montreal Styling Diva, Shelbee on the Edge, The Grey Brunette, My Random Musings, Glass of Glam, and Away from the Blue.
Holy moly you look amazing! I love everything about this. Guess what? I have a pair of wide leg culotte jeans I’ve saved from the early 2000s & I’m so happy I did! You are so darling and I love the pale pink.
Glad you like it, Andrea! 🙂
I love this look, very fresh and fun and here’s the thing. To me, you look like you always do in your photos. I see expressions and poses that I’ve seen before and love. I understand your feelings though, as I’m sure we all do. You worked your way through it and you realized your worth is not just how you look (which, btw, was amazing). More than anything, I love your mind, wit and awesome strength.
Thank you so much, Dee! 🙂
I love how you can dress it up or down – a real statement piece!
Thank you!
Thanks for sharing this, as it isn’t something we often talk about, but it’s definitely something we can all relate to!
This outfit turned out super cute – I love the pale pink colour of the top and the wide legged jeans look great on you!
Julia x
https://www.thevelvetrunway.com/
Aren’t the wide-leg jeans fun? I love the baggier jean trend. And I agree- we all go through body image stuff, so sharing it makes sense!
This has happened to me too! I’ve had pictures when I go to edit, I hate absolutely all of them and I need to reshoot. I love this top on you.
Jennifer
Curated By Jennifer
Right? Super frustrating and can have a lasting impact on your self-esteem. We all go through it- time to normalize it and talk about it!
Such an important topic, and glad you are so transparent about it and took some time for a break and to reflect on it. When I was fashion blogging, I went through this too. There is so much pressure and unrealistic beauty standards.
You look super cute in this outfit, in love with the corset top:)
Martha
http://www.lifeshinelane.com
Unrealistic is totally the word- because even the models don’t even look like they’re depicted in editorials/on Instagram! They’ve been Photoshopped and FaceTuned to fit that mold, too. It’s so wild.
Girl – I feel you SO much on this. There are outfits I style that I am so excited about, and then I upload the pictures and want to cry because of all the things I hate about how I look. It’s all in our heads, but still – so hard to deal with! You are rockin’ this look and the top is so different & fun!
Shauna
http://www.lipglossandlace.net
Right? It’s totally all in our heads- people don’t even notice the things we pick apart about ourselves- but that doesn’t make it any less real when all of the sudden your body image is in the garbage. It can be so tough! I think it’s a journey we’re all to be more accepting of our bodies.
Gosh, it’s so relateable. It’s not just size but aging too. My mom struggles with this so much that she won’t bare her arms anymore. She even says she “can’t” which is so sad to me.
It’s time we normalize EVERY body!!
And we have to learn to talk to ourselves like we talk to our friends. The negative self-talk is terrible.
I love the corset and I may even try it.
XOXO
Jodie
http://www.jtouchofstyle.com
TOTALLY about aging as well. And your poor mom- I know that feeling, like you “can’t” show a piece of yourself because it’s too this or too that. It’s heartbreaking! Normalizing all bodies regardless of shape, color, size, or age is THE VIBE!
Weeewww super beautiful, you have many qualities because every outfit suits perfectly to you
Thank you!
You look amazing! I completely understand on the body positivity side of things – I rarely take outfit photos and tend to HATE them when I do and it always drains my mood x
mia // https://beautiful-inspiring-creative-life.com/
It can definitely be a drain, I hear you. I think we’re all working toward a place of being more positive and accepting of our bodies, but it’s a tough road!
Oh yes I have gone through this many times. It can be discouraging for sure. Today’s standards are so intense. And seeing one self in a bad light or bad light lol is not fun. Sometimes I look at photos of myself and think I look so old and tired. But remember the camera does not see the way the eye sees. So what the camera is showing is not what a person really looks like. So keep that in mind but still very frustrating after all that work.
The top is so fun!! I just order a top from Karen Brit Chick’s line with Amazon with The Drop. It is made to order and I am super excited to get it!
Allie of
http://www.allienyc.com
I’m totally with you- when you see the photos where you aren’t posed just so or a candid shot or a photo in bad lighting, your body image/self image can take a HIT. The camera doesn’t see the way the eye sees; I LOVE THIS. And it’s very true!
Karen’s collection is SO damn cool! I can’t wait to see the top you got!
Such a cute style! The pink top looks so good on you!
xoxo
Lovely
http://www.mynameislovely.com
Thank you, Lovely!
Loving this top so much! Nice styling! Wonderful Post! Have a great day!
Rampdiary | Fineartandyou | Beautyandfashionfreaks
Thank you, Jyoti!
Casual chic outfit goals! I love your pink top!
Kisses, Paola.
Expressyourself
My Instagram
Thank you, babe!
Definitely I can relate to this…so annoying! This top looks so pretty on you and I love the styling with the jeans and sandals.
https://www.aproposh.com
Thank you, Yvonne!
I love the retro vibe of the corset top and denim, what a blast from the past! I’m sorry you weren’t happy with the photos – I can’t imagine having taken that many and being frustrated with them!
My current blog is the longest I’ve ever had a blog (nearly 10 years) and to stick with it I set myself the challenge that if I wore the outfit out the house I’d photograph it and share the pic – even if I hated the pic or the outfit. I still have days where I wish I had a better pic to share, but in the end it’s keeping it real and even if I didn’t like the outfit in the end I can share that. the good thing about blogging is you see everyone’s different comments and opinions – my favourite outfit in a post isn’t everyone’s favourite most of the time, everyone has different likes and dislikes 🙂
Hope you are having a nice week and feeling better!
Away From The Blue
I think that’s so good + helpful, Mica- to always share the picture, no matter how you feel about it. It normalizes how you look on different days, during different life seasons, etc.
Thank you for sharing your journey with this shoot. I can totally relate. I appreciate you shedding light on how we don’t appreciate our bodies. I need to get this corset top!
https://www.kathrineeldridge.com
We’ve all been there, right? I thought it was important to share because I know we all go through it at some point or another. 🙂
This topic is something that we can all relate to and struggle with from time to time. And we should talk about it! Societies standards put so much pressure on us and it’s hard not to beat ourselves up about how we look and feel sometimes. Your process of how you stepped back, journaled your feelings, and then picked the sentences apart is such a good way to change your perspective. I’m so glad you posted this – it’s so helpful and I’m going to pin this!
Also, love your corset top and this entire look! So chic!
Jill – Doused in Pink
Aw, thank you so much, Jill. I agree- societal programming is deeply engrained in all of us and we’re surrounded by it all the time. I have been trying harder to accept my body however it shows up over the past year and have tried to heal a lot of the harmful pressure society puts on us to fit a certain beauty standard/mold. It’s a lifelong process, I think!
Lately it feels like this describes how I feel pretty much every day when I catch a glimpse of myself in a mirror and I literally have to have to stop myself and say “stop it” aloud before that negativity goes any further.
Courtney ~ Sartorial Sidelines
And it’s very important to say those things- to reassure yourself and stop the negative thinking because it can take hold so easily.
Thanks so much for sharing this – I have had shoots like this and it really knocks my confidence. My husband thinks I’m criticising his photography if I say I don’t like the photos, but some days I’m just not feeling good about myself. It happens to everyone. I think you look great in this outfit – you always look fabulous! Thanks for sharing at the #stylewithasmile link up!
Emma xxx
http://www.style-splash.com
I totally relate to this- it can be such a struggle! And right back at you, lady, you always look gorgeous!
One thing I have to remind myself when taking pictures is that I have birthed 4 kiddos and I do not need to be rail thin! I think that we all need to remember that society standards and what is portrayed out there is not always real not is it necessary for us to try to attain it. In the past few years, I have learned how much confidence can make a difference but I still do toss most of the pictures I think are not flattering. Sharing a look with wide legged jeans like this next week! I am trying to venture out with some different fits.
http://www.chezmireillefashiontravelmom.com
This is a lovely outfit! I really like your style. 🙂 http://www.bauchlefashion.com/2021/08/chanels-take-on-modernism-6-bags-im.html
Thank you!
This look is so fresh and so cool!
https://chicchedimamma.com/
Thank you!
Hi Ashley
I enjoyed reading your post. I am sure we all look and scrutinize pictures, especially as bloggers. I know what you are saying! The top is a pretty color with the wide leg grey jeans, love it!
thanks for linking!
jess xx
http://www.elegantlydressedandstylish.com
I’m so glad you decided to share these photos, and sending all the hugs! You look gorg as always, and you weren’t kidding about that fab top and the perfect lighting <3
Green Fashionista
I’m so glad you shared this and your process to overcome it. I’ve gone through the same thing and sometimes the shoot just doesn’t work. I think you look absolutely amazing in that corset top!
You look great in that outfit.
Love the hair.
Ann
https://roomsofinspiration.blogspot.com/
Thank you!
I love the combination, it looks great!
Danielle | thereluctantblogger.co.uk
Thank you!
Very unique piece, and I love the sandals!
have a great weekend,
S
Thank you!
Thank you for sharing this story that we all experience and rarely talk about. We are our worst critiques and really choose to beat ourselves up. I am sorry you had that experience recently and am glad that you are comfortable speaking up about it. Your photos always look wonderful, but I know what you mean. We want perfection with the outfits, ourselves, the lighting, the backdrop, but it’s not always honest or realistic. Your outfit is adorable and you pull it off with confidence.
bosbodaciousblog.blogspot.ca
You look lovely! We can definitely all be our own worst critics sometimes, especially as social media warps beauty standards
I’m glad you posted theses pictures because you look amazing in theses shots. This corset is so cute ! Now I want one like this.
And thanks for sharing theses thoughts because it truely happens a lot when you take pictures of yourself and them I remember It’s just a picture and if I would of take in a different way I would of probably feel better about myself.
But I totally understand how hard it is to see ourselves sometimes.
xx
Margot
https://troughthepasturesofthesky.com
Yes. It’s true. It happened to me.
I had this exact reaction after a photoshoot I’d put a lot of energy into, only to be deeply disappointed by the results. So much so I not only never posted them but deleted them, which is significant because they represented hours of effort.
Even worse, the failure struck at my core. As you describe, experiences like this can crawl into our psyche and do damage. For me, it was sowing doubt about whether I’m “real” — i.e., authentically female, and not some sad genderless person with futile hopes. For over a week, I agonized over that question. If I’m not female — because I can’t create a convincing image of one — what am I? Nothing?
Thank you for your courage and candor. We help others when we reveal our humanity, good and bad.
I’m so obsessed with the top and you look fabulous! Also I’m very glad you shared about body image in your post, it’s so true and we can all feel the pressure from society to look a certain way.
Eileen | yesmissy.com
Beautiful look!
I think we can all relate with this. It’s important to remember to take it easy on ourselves in situations like this.
http://www.fashionradi.com
Love how flirty and feminine this looks! The details on that top is really chic as well, and the color is flattering on you!
What a cute look. I hope you have a wonderful day.
http://www.rsrue.blogspot.com
You look lovely ❤
I love that you’re sharing this. We all have days when we feel like we don’t look our best or have a photo shoot that doesn’t come out to our expectations. I think overall we’re just really hard on ourselves and think we have to live up to these crazy standards that society puts on us.
P.S I have that same corset and am obsessed with it! I love how you styled it with the wide-leg jeans!
Tracy
FindYourDazzle
you look fabulous!!!
love those jeans!!!
https://www.itzytrendy.com/2021/08/agatha-shoes.html
Super cute outfit and brilliantly inspiring post, my friend! I am all too familiar with these things your speak of. And the same here, out of approximately 150 pictures for each photo shoot, I manage to get 20-30 decent ones but I have had shoots were every photo was just awful! And it does send you into a bad body image spiral. I always remind myself that we never look frozen in time like pictures make it seem. We are always in fluid motion and people don’t view us in real life as frozen in one particular pose! That perspective has definitely helped me weather the bad photo storms! Great post!
Shelbee
http://www.shelbeeontheedge.com
Tell it, girlfriend! I can absolutely relate to this post. Sometimes, photo shoots don’t go well because the angles are not right or the outfit doesn’t fit the way I envisioned them, but it’s one day out of a lifetime. So, like you, I take some time away, clear my head, and then come back with a fresh mind and eyes and when I do that, it’s never as bad as I originally thought it was. You are so great with articulating this issue women may have. Thank you for sharing your experience. You look so beautiful in this shoot and your smile is so pretty! 🙂
http://lizzyslatest.com/